Wednesday, October 6, 2010

If Momma Ain't Happy...

I have enjoyed the privilege of being involved in women’s ministries for as long as I can remember. Why? I believe that we women need support to be the best we can be as wives, daughters, friends and nurturers. We are made to give and give and give some more, and without each other, we will shrivel up, crumble, and blow away like a fallen autumn leaf. Many years ago, I enjoyed ‘women’s ministries’ in the form of my Mary Kay business, and have enjoyed that role for more than ten years. Now, my women’s ministry role includes bible studies, connection events, and retreats, so that we can refuel.

Why do we women need so much support? Because we are emotional beings!

There’s no doubt about it: my emotional state of being on any given day has a huge impact on the emotional barometer in my home. I strongly believe in being responsible for my own self-care, not to be confused with being self-ish. Self-care means I am taking ownership of what makes me ‘tick’, I am in charge of my passion meter, and I am to harness my emotional needs in a way so I can nurture them. There are three primary self-care methods that keep me sane. First and foremost is my time with God. If I don’t get to sit my bottom down into a chair with that bible on one hand and a pen and paper in the other, my entire day seems scattered. Another favorite variation of self-therapy is a visit to a book store, particularly those which have coffee shops, too, and boy oh boy the fresh-brewed coffee aroma permeating the air, swirling through the smell of fresh, new paper…it’s absolutely heavenly. So if I can’t be with God directly, I’d rather be in a bookstore, or my favorite is the final source of self-therapy: the glittering gem of treasure in self-care: my precious girlfriends. This self-care frees me to meet the needs of others—my husband, children, friends, and family. “If Momma ain’t happy…,” well, you know the rest.

I have engaged in a change in perspective lately, though. Instead of looking at my self-care practices to make sure I have my emotional needs met, I decided to accept a recent challenge which stated that my husband and my children ARE my ministry. Yes, I am involved in a number of ministries, but if I lose sight of my most important ministry—my own husband and kids—nothing else matters. Now my mantra is “If they are all happy, then Momma is happy!” With a focus on them first, while simultaneously keeping a pulse on my own self-care meter, I can know that who I am and what I do are making a difference. Making a difference in my home is where it all starts; then I know I am making a difference in the world. I think it’s what we all might want: to make a difference. I thank God for this new perspective.

Tip of the week:
Don’t quit! I speak frequently about losing weight and persevering, but when the rubber meets the road, there is always a place where we all want to quit. It’s too hard. It takes too long. It’s not fun anymore. The only way to fail in weight loss, or any challenge in life, is to quit. That fact alone keeps me going. Even if I’m messing up, again, I am committed not to quit.

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